Why we need to change…
I just watched an original film by Gary Vee on change:
It’s so important to change that I thought I’d talk to you about it today. It’s something I have always had very mixed feelings about and here is why, I change my mind on things constantly. I went through a ten year period in my life when I moved every six months and I’ve changed my job or life path so many times I’ve lost count. For example I’ve been an artist, a teacher, a dancer, a singer, a tribute act, a songwriter, a sales rep, a tour manager… there’s probably loads more, but they’re probably the most interesting ones.
Wayne Dyer is one of my favourite people. I met him some years ago and he had such a good energy, a genuine man. He once said,
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”
As people who are looking to become more awakened or conscious in the way we are and live, I think we recognise the idea that we need to have massive change in our attitudes. Things we’re already really aware of would be things like needing to be more grateful, be more humble, be less judgemental… all of these things are conscious changes that most awakening people recognise and work on.
There is no doubt, particularly if you are new to awakening and you want to live a happier life, working on these things will help… So ideas on this would be, for example:
Being more grateful I recommend keeping a gratitude journal and writing three things in it morning and night… also make a note every night of how the Universe has helped you. Perhaps you had a near miss with something or found something you were looking for or you were in the right place at the right time. A law of attraction coach I had fifteen years ago, got me to do this and it really does make you aware of how things are going well for you. It re orients your mind to see this more and the more you see it, the more it occurs.
Being more humble Every time you go to tell someone about something you have done or achieved, don’t! Ha ah.. It’s tempting to do but it doesn’t help as it creates its opposite… if get into the habit of talking about our achievements in such a way that we want to advertise it to others, this becomes an issue when everything goes to the wall, which it invariably will do, since this is a duality. Recognising that we are sometimes up and sometimes down and this is no reflection on us but on the nature of life, is very helpful. If we are telling others how we have done well, we are really entering into competition and setting ourselves up for anxiety regarding any future loss or fail.
Be less judgemental I truly believe that almost everyone – if not everyone – you judge could be you… If you look hard enough, you can see that almost everything you complain about or point fault at in others could perhaps also be directed at you by someone else or in a different time. I am lucky, I have a very quick karma… if I get annoyed that someone has done something and I complain (even internally) about it, I will almost instantly unintentionally do the same sort of stupid thing in my own life as if to demonstrate my own ignorance at being judgemental. Reserve judgement. If you can’t do it internally, at least don’t say it out loud. Instead say, ‘that could be me’ and be compassionate to see how that could be true.
On the whole starting to see that we’re all pretty much the same, you are no more or less special than anyone else, there is no need to compete and push as if life is a race or a heartless game, the happier you’ll be. Love others, help, be of service, talk other women (or men) up not down…This is the change that most awakening talks of and it is fantastic advice.
But it’s not really the change I want to talk about today. Today’s change is more practical. It’s more about being prepared to change our minds and change the direction and course of our lives.
I believe there are three big myths around our lives that can cause us to get stuck:
Myth 1… We tend to think that change is hard We think the way we are fundamentally is more set in stone than it is. I was afraid of flying for twenty years… it was very strong, very real, very full on… I’ve written about this change in every nearly every book I’ve written because it was such a shocking revelation when it went. I had a nervous breakdown and the fear just went. I will never know why for sure. It made me see how bizarre and flaky our minds really are. There I was thinking I had this huge issue and all of a sudden it was gone – probably because I had an even bigger issue to deal with. Starting to imagine that your mind is not as set as you think is a massive eye opener… it also demonstrates something I’ve become very aware of and that is the need to challenge your fears… they’re probably not as hard to break through as you think.
Myth 2… We think Changing your life, your ideas, your habits or your opinions makes you flaky or weak It’s the opposite – it shows strength, growth and humility. There’s only one way to grow and that’s to change. Regarding other people’s opinions, I found a real stigma around it but check out the people who challenge you for changing your life or taking chances on living your best life. Are they really trying to help you or are they projecting their issues or fears on to you? Regarding self judgement, if you know intuitively that you need to make a change then don’t be afraid to follow it. This is growth. This is good. However, be careful not to be impetuous or emotional – this is not the same as being intuitive of course. Making changes will not cause your life to implode. It’s much easier to chop and change about than fear based modern culture would have you believe.
Myth 3… It’s too late There’s such a sense that if you’re not in your perfect life by 25 then you’re in trouble. It just isn’t true at all. Where ever we are, we are just getting started! If we’re 18 or 80, there’s still every reason to change your life if it’s what you want. It’s our natural state as human beings to expand and grow… some motivational people say if you’re not growing you’re dying. I’m not sure I’d agree with that, but it is our natural state to want to grow. Perhaps if you’re going through an awakening, you have started to realise that you would be better to grow on the vertical level rather than horizontal but it’s all growth. By this I mean that you are looking for greater self awareness, depth and a sense of beingness as growth rather than just accumulating more on a horizontal 3D level. The idea of it being too late is just that – an idea in the mind. If you check your thoughts, mostly they are negative and fearful – it’s always too late or wrong or not right for you if you listen to the mind. The mind likes a sad story about itself and for itself. Spending time tuning out of the mind and into the heart will give you the zest and impetus to make the changes.
I would urge you to watch Gary Vee’s film, whilst he may or may not be someone you like, his ideas about change will change your views on changing.
If we want to really grow, we may well need to make big changes, that might mean looking stupid or like we’ve messed up, so what? We’re growing and learning human beings. I know that I’d rather look stupid in other people’s eyes than wrong in my own. Perhaps we’re actually being challenged by our situations in order that we can overcome our addictions to other peoples opinions… how about that??? It certainly has been the case for me and perhaps for you too.
The main points I really want to make are that you’re not wrong to make changes to your life as and when you feel guided, it’s never too late and it’s probably easier than you think.
Love Kat xx